Welcome to the second installment of the report on the Mann-Conomy Update! This report will cover all the remaining weapons unveiled to the TF2 universe and analyze their impact on competitive play.

Mad Milk

This unlockable weapon for the Scout takes the place of his pistol. It functions like Jarate, a one-time thrown item. Whenever you deal damage to an enemy covered in milk, you receive 75% of the damage dealt as an addition to your own health.

This is an interesting weapon. It works in a similar manner to the Scout's two other unlocks: one use for a great advantage (invulnerability, high damage, or health). Currently, 75% is a lot of health to get. Land a point-blank meatshot and you've got half your health back, or more. However, if you're down on primary ammunition, it won't help one bit. This is a team weapon, and whether it will be as greatly used as the Jarate is remains to be seen. This author is peering into his magic crystal ball... and calling the Mad Milk balanced for competitive play.

From the CEVO site:

As the season is quickly coming to a close, here is a brief look at the playoff structure for our 6th season of TF2. Since week 8 concludes on Thursday, October 21st, the playoffs will begin the subsequent week. Playoff seeds and schedules will be released on Saturday, October 23rd for all three divisions (all regular season matches must be completed by Friday, October 22nd).

Below you will find specific information about your division's playoff schedule...

Dates and Map Rotation:

Professional:

The CEVO-P playoffs will consist of the top 4 teams from the division. These teams will compete in a double elimination bracket until one team is declared winner.

Round 1: cp_coldfront - Thursday, October 28th
Round 2: cp_granary - Monday, November 1st
Round 3: cp_badlands - Thursday, November 4th
Round 4: bo3 finals (tiebreak: cp_gullywash_imp3) - Monday, November 8th

CEVO-P Brackets: TBA

Main:

The CEVO-M playoffs will consist of the top 8 teams in the division ranked by the CPI. These teams will compete in an 8 team double-elimination bracket until a winner is crowned.

Round 1: koth_viaduct - Thursday, October 28th
Round 2: cp_gullywash_imp3 - Monday, November 1st
Round 3: cp_gravelpit - Thursday, November 4th
Round 4: cp_granary- Monday, November 8th
Round 5: cp_badlands - Thursday, November 11th
Round 6: bo3 finals (tiebreak: cp_badlands) - Monday, November 15th

CEVO-M Brackets: TBA

Amateur:

The CEVO-A playoffs will consist of the top 16 teams in the division ranked by the CPI. These teams will compete in an 16 team double-elimination bracket until a winner is crowned.

Round 1: koth_viaduct - Thursday, October 28th
Round 2: cp_gullywash_imp3 - Monday, November 1st
Round 3: cp_coldfront - Thursday, November 4th
Round 4: cp_gravelpit - Monday, November 8th
Round 5: cp_granary - Thursday, November 11th
Round 6: cp_badlands - Monday, November 15th
Round 7: koth_viaduct - Thursday, November 18th
Round 8: bo3 finals (tiebreak: cp_badlands) - Monday, November 22nd

CEVO-A Brackets: TBA

Note: More information on the CPI can be found here: http://www.cevo.com/?page=forum&func=viewthread&id=4120

Hello. I took the time to interview Sqwiggle, captain of the AG-sponsored team Sqwigglin’ with Sqwiggle. Right now they are in TWL Div-1 and they are very likely contenders for the playoffs in CEVO-A, only suffering a loss to the currently #1 team Swagger Like Mcjagger.

Sakura: Tell me about yourself and your team.

Sqwiggle: Well, I've been playing TF2 comp for about a year and a half now.  I started off as pocket solly, but eventually switched over to demo.  I have been on "one" team the entire time although the roster has changed quite a bit since then.  The core of the team has been together for about a year.  With Meo on medic and ClandestinePz on pocket and CombatPanda on scout.  The last two spots have been in flux for quite some time now changing every season.  Currently with h0ly^ on roamer and Clown as the other scout. As a team we have been hovering around low/mid-mid/low whatever.  We have seen quite a bit of improvement moving into this season and since we have fun while playing, so everything has been working out nicely.

Sakura: What do you guys hope to achieve/get out of this CEVO-A season?

Sqwiggle: Well, I mean really my biggest hope was to play a whole season without roster issues so, haha.  So far everything is going great and it looks like we have a pretty good chance of making it pretty far through the playoffs. And like I said we have made some really good progress as a team so that is always awesome.

Sakura: You guys have pulled off a really good season so far. What do you think has contributed to your team's success?

Sqwiggle: We have taken the time to actually practice the map.  Run through some strats, roll outs and just general team coordination.  I think really just playing with the same people for so long really helps, as you always have some idea what everyone else.

Sakura: How did you meet AG and get sponsored by them?

Sqwiggle: Well Meo had been on the team for almost the entire time and along with Nahanni, they run AG, so haha.  Eventually we needed a server so it was the logical choice.  Also they are da best.

Sakura: Is there anything in CEVO that you felt could have been done better?

Sqwiggle: Umm so far I think the season has gone really well.  My only complaint was they never said which version of gullywash, haha.

Sakura: What about maps? Any maps you would've liked to play but aren't in the map rotation?

Sqwiggle: It's always nice to see some new maps in the rotation instead of the same old maps.

Sakura: Ok, last question. What advice can you give to new teams?

Sqwiggle: Just find some people you get along with and keep with them for awhile.

DON’T BE MAD, a guide to being a pure gentleman before, in, and after a game and the effects of being one.

“OH GOD F* HE IS SO LOW JESUS JUST KILL HIM WOW WHAT THE F*”.

Oh, mumble comms. How much we love them. Haven’t we all experienced a teammate in a clan, mix, or a pickup game who just doesn’t understand the how-to of it? Add a bit of rage to it – usually due to him going as aggressive as a mad donkey, then proceeding to get one (somehow extremely important, at least to him) scout or soldier very low and you have a fine mess made, with the others either sighing into their microphones or raging back.

So the completely anonymous person who is not me who is raging, what about him? Some heat never screwed up a game, right? Well, to use an example – last night I committed sacrilege, I played medic, a class I utterly detest and harbour only the worst feelings for. My precious pocket soldier, the ever-loving source of protection and patriotic remarks, decided to embark on a journey from our more or less secure position of yard. Ten seconds later, !%#%@^ GOD WOW WHAT THE- IM DEAD SCOUT LOW SCOUT LOW” he cried. Amused (as I’ve already given up on even trying) I thought what god forgotten place might that very, very low scout be? Why, my soldier said said, on your head perhaps? I looked up and there smiled a bloodied face, with a – gasp – scattergun pointing at me! Skipping all the descriptions of my valiant battle, I proceeded to do a grand total of a hundred and twenty damage before dying, after which I punched the keyboard in fury and screamed at my soldier “LOW WHO THE HELL IS LOW HUH WHO’S LOW?”. So what have we learned from this completely pointless but oh so entertaining to write diary entry? Well, that

a) the amount of swear words/second ratio was wrong in his call,

b) that calling a scout to be low just because you’re humiliated to admit he meatshotted your face off is not the right idea when facing an angry medic afterwards,

c) and that sulking afterwards is the only worse thing one can do, instead of admitting blame.

Let us actually proceed to the “guide” itself though, as I’m getting ahead of me self. A note to the reader, if you’ve survived this far: I am not going to talk only about mumble but also overall communications, even to your opponent.

Gentleman, let us talk about communication.

The Mann-Conomy Update has dropped! Polycount weapons, new hats, and many other new features abound! These articles aim to analyze the new features as they affect the competitive scene. Obviously they're all banned for the current season, but that won't stop me!

The first article will focus on the primary weapons revealed in the update, and their functions within the game.

The month of September is over, and now its time for the eXtv crew to get to work on making the Top 10 plays of the month!

We need your help though! Without your clips the Top 10 wouldn't exist! So get them in! Any league or tournament action from the month of September is eligible for the top 10. Clips can be submitted via our nifty form over at eXtelevision.com or sent to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it The clip submission form parses our clips for us, and helps with organization. If you send in a clip manually, be sure to include top 10 in the title as well as sending us the necessary information.

After Oct 5th we will assume that all new Top10 submissions are for the month of October, so please get your September clips in quickly!

I woke up this morning much like I do every morning, with coffee and a brief perusal of my hat collection. Choosing a stylish fedora to match my equally stylish pajamas, I trotted off to class, not at all expecting the glorious events the day would hold. Upon my return, I notice my TF2 madly trying to update using the notoriously rage inducing Chicago server. A quick e-visit to my friends in Burma later, and I was golden. I was already grumbling about huds and demos inevitably being horribly broken, about povo taking his sweet euro ass time to update his glorious display. But all that was quickly forgotten as the sweet sound of hats came clanging to my ears. And then trading! Finally trading!

Combining these two things together inevitably creates the opportunity for hundreds of frenzied hat fetishists to flock to IRC, desperately waiting to con their fellow gamers out of one of those shiny new hats. So this raises the question: which hats are the best hats? Well fear not fellow hat simulator enthusiasts, I will educate you on which hats (and I suppose weapons) are the finest of the fine, but only after the break.

From the CEVO site:

All items introduced with the Mann-conomy patch are banned from CEVO matches. Any rounds in which a team uses any of these items will be overturned in favor of the other team.

As many of you may know, Valve has dropped a major TF2 update featuring the Mann Co. Store, tons of new items and so forth.

Details are below:

(1)Knockout Gaming vs (4)Northern Resistance

Knockout gaming is number one right now and for good reason. They have been together for a while now and should have no problem with the higher coordination that Gravelpit requires. Northern Resistance have only one loss right now though their matches haven’t been hard ones. They do have a former ESEA invite player and a current intermediate player. This game is going to be good and close and I’m honestly anticipating the outcome.
Score: 2-1 Northern Resistance

(2)Avoided Gaming vs (6)98%

Avoided Gaming is composed of really nice individually talented players and are surely 2nd place for good reasons. However 98% is doing very well right now in both CEVO and ESEA. They have been around a bit longer than Avoided Gaming and will be able to slightly out coordinate plus DM them.
Score: 2-1 98%

(8)Team Ace vs (7)Kamikaze Kangaroos

I think everyone knows Ace because they have been around for a few seasons with close to the same roster which will help them with the overall higher coordination required to do well on Gravelpit. Both Ace and Kamikaze Kangaroos have been working on new strategies with hopes of catching the other off guard. It will be interesting to see what these two teams come up with, but regardless it should be close.
Score: 2-1 Kamikaze Kangaroos

(7)VG-TF2 vs (3)Pango

VG, formerly W$uT, is not a team to be taken lightly as they do have good coordination. However I am told that they are not quite in the Gravelpit rhythm quite yet. This will be a problem considering Pango is coming off a big win against formerly undefeated Northern Resistance. They ares considered to be a strategy-oriented team which will help big time on Gravelpit.
Score: 2-1 Pango

(5)James "Weezy" Henson Memorial Team vs (11)Fallback

I am on Team Fallback and will not be predicting this match to avoid bias.

(9)Carnal Gaming vs (13)Tiny Men

Carnal gaming has been around for a while now and placed well in CEVO-A last season. Tiny Men on the other hand are a brand new team and have 2 players that are new to competitive TF2. Since Gravelpit requires more coordination than other maps I have to give this to the team that has been around the block already.
Score: 2-0 Carnal Gaming

(12)Treason vs (14)PROkemans

Currently both of these teams don’t have the most impressive records in the world, PROkemans’ have two wins one being a forfeit and treason has only one win. Treason’s DM generally comes second to their strategy which works out perfect seeing as this weeks map is Gravelpit. Their only problem right now is that they will be down the starting roaming soldier, but have been told ahead of time and are ready to play. PROkemans’ have said that they are a bit worried about the higher level or coordination that Gravelpit involves. however two of their players are former Treason players and probably know a thing or two about Treason’s strategies, not to mention that PROkeman’s can DM just as well as Treason. This game is one of the harder ones to predict because it will be close and either team could pull out the victory.
Score: 2-1 Treason

(16)Kobrakai vs (15)North Korean BBQ

Looking at Kobrakai’s 3-0 record, you would think highly of this team but all of them have been forfeit wins so their performance remains to be seen. In fact, they have yet to actually play a CEVO match because their week 4 match still hasn’t been played. North Korean BBQ have three people that are constantly playing and the other three people are decided shortly before each game. I’m told this roster problem will be solved soon, but it might not be in time for the Gravelpit match. Luckily, they have a chance since Kobrakai hasn’t played a single match yet.
Score: 2-1 North Korean BBQ

(17)$4 Machetes vs (18)Cash50 and the Mid Ringers

Although the Machetes currently have a terrible record in CEVO, they also play ESEA and are 5-1. I have been told they are having a hard time scheduling matches and getting all starters to play. That's too bad as they do have talent on the team such as their crazy sniper/scout Nonis (notice I put sniper first). Being that Cash50 and the Mid Ringers have only played 1 out of 4 games and lost, I don't know whether they are to be taken seriously and this match will decide that. As of right now its definitely going to $4.
Score: 2-0 $4 Machetes

Thanks Fearless from Kamikaze Kangaroos for helping edit <3

Yesterday was the 330^th time I've been covered in jarate, and, like every time, it felt like the first all over again: there I am, bombing rockets onto a control point, diving in for an enemy medic, or laying sticky traps, when I hear the unmistakable cry of a grown man launching a jar of pee through the air. Then the whoosh, the crash. Then the yellow drippy drip across the screen. Humiliation sinks in.

It's hard to explain this to onlookers, especially people who don't get Team Fortress 2. They ask, “What just happened? What did he throw? Why is the screen dripping yellow?”

I have many answers, all bad: “He is a filthy gypsy beverage salesman.” “He thought I was on fire.” “I have paid cash money for this in a house of ill reputation.”

Eventually, I have to come clean. “He threw pee on me.”

“Pee? Like pee pee?”

“Yes,” I say. “He keeps it in a jar. He stores it up and he keeps it in a jar and he waits for me.”

I love bandwagons. I love jumping on them after they become really big and popular and then running up and down on said bandwagons, crying out desperately for attention. To that end, here I am, dressed in a bright neon green jumpsuit, informing you about TWL New's TF2 Clips.

Partly because we want to look cool, and partly because I want to make use of the free Adobe products my school throws at me every time CS gets a bigger number, TWL News is combining with TWL TF2 and introducing a slightly used, gently loved variation on the old theme: the weekly clip of awesomeness. Yes, Virginia, now you too can have an unprofessional and poorly edited video throwing light and fame onto your brief moment of competence.