CommunityFortress

Ladies and gents, it's here: the final week of UGC's Season 4 Highlander League!

Also, a hurricane!  Here in not-so-sunny Philadelphia, seven buildings collapsed and three small terriers were carried off to the great doggy park in the sky there to bite the legs of Hell Bear.  Hell Bear does not take kindly to biting of any kind.  Dark weather ahead, boyos.

But while the worst is over for fair Philly, the eye of the storm is hovering over tomorrow's UGC matches in what will be the final round of the season. All the pain and effort and glory boil down to tomorrow's slugfest.  Who will glow with victory?  Who will sulk in the shadow of leg-bitten Hell Bear? Who will owe me five bucks on the books?

Without further ado, let's recap week 6's highlights and get down to the final nitty-gritty!

Week 7: ctf_haarp_test8/cp_gravelpit

Platinum Division

Classic Mix-Up continued their undefeated hoo-ha over Lonely Hearts (2-0).  New rule: members of CLASSIC are required to play one-handed next season.  That should stunt their record by a match or two.  Meanwhile, Gun Runners and Death Marked Soldiers treated Unbelievably Brave Sweethearts and Swift Smoke Squad to creme de beat-downs and picked up the respective tabs 2-0 and 2-1.  Did Stephen and Friends defeat Ess Two?  No, they did not.  They gave old Ess the forfeit and went home to soak their feet.  Exodus Jedi, on the other hand, didn't forfeit.  Exodus Jedi went out and bought Sexy Ass Gamers some lacey things and then got drunk and came home and threw up in SAG's lap for a nasty 2-0 slip-and-slide.

What did the Euros do?  Schlachtfestchen.de Highlander challenged Orzelki Akademii Max-Play.pl to a battle of WHO HAS A LONGER AND MORE ANNOYING NAME TO WRITE OUT.  Sf took it 2-0.  That's it, I'm sending Hell Bear.  Reliable Commander X and the Sex Kittens got saucy on Max-Play Highlander Team (2-0).  Word from Berlin is that they made up and had coffee.  Also, their hairs are all very nice.

Steel Division

Madness!  Chaos!  With Haarp discovered to be six kinds of borked, teams could default to the haven that is gravel pit.  Self-Sustaining Mexican Cat Ranchers took Axl-Ffu 2-0 while Desolation Angels laid waste to Knights of the Apocalypse 2-1.  A Tin Team slumped to bEnt on gravel pit and feels the pain of an un-practiced gravel pit hoe-down.  Teams!  Practice your stock maps!  Know your classic standard!  Imbibe them like vitamins and sunshine and feel within you the sweet succor of goodness!  Speaking of goodness, Magical Frolicking Unicorns rolled, smoked, and discarded Stock 4 Pubs 2-0.  Axl's A+Team wandered into Exodus Society's backyard; there was an altercation involving a barbecue grill, three packs of hot dog buns, a Coors Lite, and a 2-0 win for Axl.  Police are looking into the matter.  Did Team Player somehow overcome Free Frag Network 2-0?  They did!  I feel for spoon and co as they are our other favorite Highlander team next to Tin.  Brothers, mourn not alone.  Free shall join you in getting silly drunk on the steps of City Hall and chased by the rent-a-cops.

Week 8 Predictions: ctf_turbine_pro b1

Platinum Division

I refuse to discuss CLASSIC.  Instead, I'll take ExJedi over uBs and <3 over BRB,U.  So there!

Euro: Sex Kitten over OAMP and CF over Sf.  Hail the hyphen!

Steel Division

TP over s4p and KR over PM are easy picks, and Axl-Ffu should take MCCT with little problem, but Gee vs fn and bEnt vs CUBI could go either way. Look for RANCH to take A+Axl and FFN to take Sn.  I suspect KA will take CSn and MAD over Felt, but there are a few matches up in the air.  First, my unicorns take on DesA, the current number 1 team in Steel division, and I predict a bloodbath.  But there's hope!  We have secret plans!  And Jinn!  So, you know.  That might work out.  GG vs Ex looks almost too close to call, but I'm taking Ex on this.

Stay tuned next week for the Season 4 Coverage finale and info on the upcoming Fall Season 5!

Agree?  Disagree?  Hit up the comments, add me on Steam, and play some Highlander!